my day and tomorrow

makan-makan (terima kasih sebab tolong habiskan part saya)
cakap-cakap (terima kasih kerana mendengar dengan setia)
gelak-gelak (terima kasih sebab trigger bunyi ini)
tengok-tengok (wayang)
beli-beli (belah)
jalan-jalan (actually, naik kereta)

it's just a typical date, i know.
but we don't get to do it all the time due to (distance, time, other commitments)
we were very happy and content though. see my time traveller right over there :-


emm. td tengok christmas carol. saye tak tau kenape saye x teruja untuk tengok new moon. at least for the sake untuk belagak2 dengan delin gile tentang cerite tu (hahaha!). harry potter saye suke, lord of the ring saye suke. new moon? mungkin saye x punya masa dan kesempatan untuk suka koot.


oh yeee, went make-up shopping tadi.excited kot sebab tengok this one video kat youtube pasal collection make up someone nie yang berlambak lambak lambaaaaaaaaak gile. jadi saye pun belilah meskipun brand elianto dan silkygirl dan bukannya mac dan stila seperti si pembuat video itu.


and lagi, balik-balik date tadi saye terus kemas-kemas meja solek and susun atur cantek baik punyaa barang-barang makeup saya tu kat atas meja bersama stok-stok makeup yang lain (berkurun), sebab saye tengok dalam video tu cantik sangat die susun.


jadi konklusinya di sini dapat saya simpulkan bahawa (eceh), video boleh memainkan peranan yang penting dalam hidup kite. (vital, life changing, haaaa ape lagi ade mai buboh!)



balik2 td, terus peluk cium Ari, oh ye, saya belikan minnies dan booties untuk die (sarung tangan dan kaki ye, jangan fikirkan beyonce ataupun kartun disney itu).



nak taw tak, mase hadzwan datang pagi tadi, and saye suruh tengokkan Ari kejap while saya bersiap, Ari merengek-rengek. hadzwan gelabah ingatkan die nak nanges. sekali preeeeeeeeeeet Ari telah kentut pada beliau.muahahahaaaa oh he's gonna be sooooooo mad at me for posting this. =)



esok, saye akan ke balik pulau pule untuk jumpe adik saye yang seorang lagi, syanaz aka angah kepada Ari. best! x sabar. did i tell yang die x balik pun raye haji ni? (outrageous). tp die ade exam. so xpe, kali nie along maafkan.(poyo je)



jadi kepada hadzwan yang akan mulakan kerja di flextronics auto city hari isnin nie, and for the coming 8 months, i wish you luck.jadilah seorang pekerja yang rajin (selalulah OT), berhemah tinggi (jangan dok buat perangai nakai tu naaaa),pakai smart-smart ye =). kalau tidaaak!! (saye tau flextronics di mana)

kurbaan

every life has it's stories. i am just blessed to come across a few of them.

1. An old, happy couple with 9 adopted children were brutally killed when their house was robbed.all 9 adopted children suffers from ADD,ADHD, Autisme and Down Syndrome. Now, their only daughter has taken care of the children like her own, and blew in them new hope and lives.
2. A physically and mentally neglected girl since birth has suffered trauma and no one hope for her to survive. By sheer luck, a concern citizen alerted the feds when he saw the dirty looking girl through a broken window of a torn down house.now, at age 10, her body and mind still functions the way of an 18 months old infant, and needed to be carried around and drink milk like a baby. a blessed couple took her into their home and treated her like their own, with the dad calling her "this is my babygirl" everytime.
3. a neglected boy was thrown away to live in a dog hut with dogs, and later, developed many dog-ly manners.he barks, growl, and even eat dog food. now, he is being taken care of by the social welfare but says that he is most happiest living like a dog.
4. a man boarded an airplane where he sat next to a distraught looking teenager and upon reluctant conversations, found out that the girl was about to go to a shelter home upon touchdown. after their talk, they part separate ways. the man and his wife begin searching for the girl, and after ten days, found her n a shelter home. she later became their adopted child and will be attending college next summer.

on the eve of raya, and in the light of "qurban", ask yourself this," what have i got that i can give back?,".



selamat hari raya aidiladha.

pendek je post nie sebab cuak vavi.

tomorrow 2105 akan keluar. taw tak 2105 tu ape? oh, tu kod subjek untuk family law. esok keluar lah resultnye.




rase ape ek? patut rase ape? erk.



untuk pengetahuan, saye dah tiga kali muntah. sekian, terima kasih.

Nur Ariessa

masuk hari nie, dah due hari saye x online. baru now dapat masa+nafas+ruang+semangat untuk online. semuanya sebab Nur Ariessa. siapekah beliau?owh, akan berjela-jela lah post nie jawabnye if saye bercerita pasal ni...(please keep an open mind and don't be judgemental okay? these are one person's personal experience and take, that might differ to the rest of the world)

pre-Ari day

dalam dua bulan lepas, mak call saye (mase tu ade di UM) and ingat lagi mase tu tgh tidur sebelum nak turun dinner kat cafe.mak kate, mak setuju nak ambil sorang anak angkat.mak mintak persetujuan saye. saye tanye, adik-adik lain macam mane? from what i heard, dorang xkisah.x kisah ade byk stages kan? the good xkisah and the bad x kisah (more like to ignore dah kot). tp i suspect its the good x kisah.mule2 tu, saye macam, "what if along x bagi?," and then mak replied, "kalau macam tu, kitorang x ambil la," . mase tu, jujur sekali cakap, saye taknak sebab saye xready mental and fizikal untuk terima orang baru dalam famili, i mean, bukan dlm care macam nie. i know it's a noble thing to do, but its a one hell of a decision that might change my life forverer.tapi, disebabkan nak jage hati mak ( it's a known fact to me that mak and abah's dream of having a baby again, especially a boy.so i said yes, i'm okay with it. then, saye cakap2 dengan wani from time to time after that, and bunyi die macam okay dengan semua nie. daripada wani, saye belajar tentang asal-usul baby tu. maaf x boleh dicerita di sini atas kepentingan pihak-pihak tertentu.hmm..saye tak pernah berpeluang untuk bercakap dengan syanaz.then, bile saye balik rumah untuk cuti sem nie, the whole family practically avoided the issue.saye pernah timbulak sekali dua, tapi abah akan ubah topik. mak kate, abah xnak put hope sangat, sebab memang sebelum nie die pernah kena tipu pasal nak ambil anak angkat nie.and i notice sebenarnye wani pun agak doubt jugak. she wouldn't look into my eyes bile ditanye. and of course, it made me doubted even more.syanaz jauh sekali taw pasal semua nie, as she's been busy in school.saye ingatkan, as the first child, syanaz and wani akan depend dekat saye untuk bertegas and say no, sebab maybe diorang rase the burden is more on me. tapi sye try untuk x entertain thoughts seperti itu. we continue life as usual.the baby was said to due on 12.12.2009.there was a lot of time to rethink this matter, really.

18.11.2009, Ari's birthday

saye bangun solat subuh, then tengok mak and abah pergi kerja., then sambung tidur balik. wani decided to sleep with me malam sebelum tu.x sampai beberape jam, and i think mase tu pukul 9pagi, mak masuk bilik and kejutkan wani. mak kate, mak kena pergi hospital sebab ibu baby tu dah bersalin.mak pergi dengan abah dari UiTM Penang. mase mule2 tu ingatkan mimpi, yelah tengah mamai-mamai lagi kan.then later mase saye dengan wani dah bangun, abah call and suruh carikan name untuk baby. mase nie kitorang dah excited sikit-sikit sebab nak dapat baby, tambah-tambah lagi doktor bagitau dulu dapat baby boy.family dengan anak and adik perempuan mane yang tak teruja dengar kan =]jadi, kitorang pun bagi la name yang dah dipilih.x lame lepas tu, mak pulak call. mak kate, "along, its a girl..xleh2, cari name girl,"aiyaaaaaaaaaaaak! panic panic. nme perempuan susah owh nak pilih..nak nak pulak yang ritma same dengan name kitorang, memang limited, and kalau ade pun, name macam kawan sendiri (haha no offence guys!)

"along2, letak Damia laa..,"
"xbleh, nanti die kena ejek dgn kawan-kawan die, damn...damn...,"

"along2, letak Ain laa...,"
"xbleh, nanti mesti name die yang mula2 ditulis dalam senarai kelas (sbb starting huruf A), kalau nanti cikgu bagi die soalan mule-mule and die xtaw jawab macam mane?,"


kahkah saye taw alasan memang x bleh pakai semua kan?


bile dah bagi name sedap2, rase2 macam xde maksud pulak.kena lah pulak bukak internet and search name and maksud-maksud yang ade. mule2, saye dan wani dah dapat persetujuan nak letak name Arisyah, tp maksud xde pulak..yang paling hampir is Arissa (seorang yang kuat dan berazam). okay, set la name Nur Arissa.


tbe2 mak kaet lagi sedap name Qalesya.erk..macam mane nie, tp suruh orang yang carikan name.hm, tp, disebabkan name Qalesya tu xde dlm senarai makna dalam internet nie, kitorg x berani la nak letak.so, Arissa la nme baby tu =]
tapi, hari nie mase abah pergi daftarkan name baby kat Jabatan Pendaftaran Negara, it became, NUR ARIESSA.ye, ade huruf E di situ.heheh.and abah went, "oh, xde ek huruf E tu? abah ingatkan ade.haha, xpelah, moden sikit,".so, itulah name baby, yang dipanggil sebagai baby Ari ye tuan-tuan dan puan-puan=]



mak cerite, mase kat hospital tu pun ade mayhem sekejap. sebab mak and abah xtaw nak buat ape. then doktor kate kat abah, encik dah ambil wudhu'? err..nak buat ape?laaaa...kan kena qamatkan baby.hahahaa lupe sebentar dah 15 tahun xde baby macam nie la jadinye.

post-Ari day, satu hari selepas shj.

saye sangat nervous untuk jumpe dengan baby tu hari nie, sebab saye tau yang kitorang dah boleh bawak balik die hari nie.i actually woke up around 8.30am, when i know i'm not going to the hospital until 3pm, sebab mak still kena jage budak exam STPM hari nie.saye siap2 kan barang-barang baby yang dibeli semalam.hehee..cerite beli barang baby pun lawak. 1st time kot beli brg2 tu semua. nasib baik ade dis big store dekat2 rumah yang memang jual barang2 baby saje.saye and wani excited skit la tgk baju2 comel and toys yg ade kat situ.sebabkan baby tu dijangka due lagi sebulan, jadi memang persediaan x buat lagi.tp alhamdulillah, semua dapat diselesaikan.pukul 3 pm tu, wani balik sekolah and kitorang gerak dari rumah ke UiTM dulu untuk ambil abah.pergi 2 kereta susah, jd bawak satu shj je.dlm perjalanan tu, saye taw yang saye kena set things straight. lumrah org timur, tambah2 org melayu, memang susah nak dngr bercerita heart-to-heart dgn keluarga msg2.tmbh2 pasal hal2 keluarga macam nie.tp saye tanak, nanti bile da dapat baby tu dalam tangan, and semua org still confuse dgn keputusan msg2.so saye beranikan diri tanye.

"mak, mak rase ape bile tgk baby tu? mak sedih tak xdpt boy?,"
"mak x sedey, mak xrase ape2..mak risau sebab mak x rase ape2..,"
"mak betul ke nak ambil baby ni?,"
"kite niat nak tolong org..mak takkan halang kalau ibu baby tu nak ambil die balik, mak akan bagi. mak akan bagi die jumpe dgn anak die even,"
"mak, betul mak x rase ape2 tgk baby tu?,"


wah, gile cepumas kan soalan saye? tapi, if x ditanye, saye xkan taw ape yang org lain dlm famili nie tgh pikir.and saye bukan bertanye sebab cemburu or what, sebab bg saye, dlm umur saye yg dah cecah 20 nie, saye dah x bergantung sangat pada keluarga, and tak timbul soal pilih kasih ke ape. saye dah besar, dah matang. cume saye nak taw betul ke semua org ikhlas or masih not sure, sebab as a family, the baby akan affect kitorg jugak.bg part saye, saye xterlalu risaukan saye sebagai seorang anak dlm famili tu, tapi saye sebagai seorang kakak pada baby tu nanti.hmm..sampai satu tahap, mak xtaw nak jawab ape.


"along, mak siyesly x rase ape..mule2 dulu excited, kejap2 x jugak..along, mak takut mak xdpt sayang baby tu,"
haaaaaaaaaaaaaa xterkejut saye dgr semua tu?that's exactly how i feel, tp too afraid utk gtaw mak.yelah, selama nie saye ingatkan yg mak org paling happy.saye try to act calm."xpela mak..kite doa banyak2 ye, mesti susah mule2..kite doa byk2 supaya Allah mudahkan hidup kite dgn baby tu lepas nie.hmm...tapi betul ke mak x rase ape?sikit pun x?,"saye x puas hati sebenarnye sebab xkan xrase ape2 kot.


"hmm, kalau along nak mak bandingkan dengan mase 1st time mak tgk along, syanaz and wani lahir kat dunia ni, mmg jauh sangat sangat sangat la perasaan tu..kamu semua anak-anak mak, darah daging mak dan abah.mak x payah belajar untuk sayang atau terima kamu.tp dgn baby nie lain, kite kne kuat dgn die.niat kte nak tolong die.rase kat baby tu ade, tp xsekuat macam mane mak rase kat kamu bertiga,"



waaaaaahhhh..mase tu jugak rase nak mentik air mate dengar. pengakuan yang paling honest.saye bukan bangga sebab mak sayang kitorang lebih or what, tu bukan reassurance yg saye nak, like i've told you.tp i felt so moved dgn kasih sayang seorang mak kepada anak-anak nya, kasih sayang someone yang bergelar ibu, yang x terbanding dgn ape pun and masih ade ruang dlm hati die untuk sayang and terima orang lain macam mane anak die sendiri.sebab ape?sebab she's a mother, and a mother can do it.wani pun x byk bercakap, saye tataw ape yg die pikir.die x suke bile saye usik die bukan anak last lagi. i think she's still battling with her feelings, which all to me now, is the same one. we know we have to do it, not just because we wanted too (ye, kami mahukan baby tu sebenarnye), and we know it's the right thing to do and we'll be granted and all, but there's still that part of you that has doubts. i dunno how else to express it.i mean, with your sisters, if you ignored them, they'll still stick around and deep inside everyfight, you know she's still your sister and you love her. but with someone else who's not, the questionis, can that kind of arrangement be made?will everything be equal?"mak takut mak tak bleh sayang die,".i'm sorry if some of you disagree.i know that for some people,love and acceptance comes naturally, but with others, you got to make choices. and more choose to have it and deal with it later the best they can.we're just that type of people.



sesampainya kat hospital tu, baby tu dah pun ade kat depan receptionist, dlm satu cart baby. 1st time tgk die,rambut dah lebat, putih sangat.wani dah, "wah, along..besar nie cantik nie,"heheee at least die buat lawak disitu.lepas kitorg ambil ibu baby tu and baby tu keluar hospital, kitorang pergi dulu kat Pejabat Pesuruhjaya Sumpah Batu Maung, untuk register baby tu as adopted untuk kitorang.that was a very emotional situation for me, the mother signed everything swiftly, and i was like, "you're going to give up your own child..,"but i know she had no choice but to do so. and last, kitorang hantar die kat depan apartment die, where abah said yang die akan jage baby nie sebaik mungkin, and die x kisah if nak mintak berjumpe dengan baby tu.mak bagi duit sikit untuk ibu baby tu, so that die boleh beli ubat and stuffs.bile mak tanye, nak pegang cium baby dulu x, die jawab xnak, sebab semalam die dah jage lame kat hospital. i don't know whether she was lying to herself to make us feel better, or lying to us to make herself feel better, or, she just doesn't feel anything at all (which i seriously doubt), but it didn't drown on us any easier either ways. die bukak pintu kereta, tutup balik, keluar and lintas jalan ke rumah die.just about then, the baby started crying... i turned and played with my handphone with red eyes.


half the journey, mak yang pegang baby tu and susukan die. bile dah sampai kat UiTM and abah ambil kereta die, i drove home with mak.this time, i held the baby.she was such a sport.tidur je sepanjang jalan, lepas dah pujuk2 die tadi.tapi balik2 tumah, die terus nangis, hehee terkejut tengok rumah baru lepas pening naik due kereta, kate wani.kitorang letak die kat matress baby yg dah dibeli, saye, mak, abah and wani duduk keliling die and we laugh because we have no clue what to do. pastu bukak2 pampers ler...beyak rupenye baby nie.okay, kelam kabut skit scene nie.abah kate,"pegang kepala die dulu, kepale die dulu..,"mak pulak kecoh2 cari baby wipes. wani try nak pasang pampers and saye try untuk tukar matress kat bawah die dengan rug yang memang khas untuk salin diapers.and baby?nangis je..hehee =] tengah2 nak pujuk die, ttbe air mate saye menitik lagi sekali. i was thinking, here she was, crying because of wet diapers, and the one's changing them is not her own mother, but four, very disoriented people.would she have mind?


td dah due kali die minum susu, and now tgh tidur kat bawah dgn mak. i really want to know what everybody is thinking and feeling right now. hahaa, ye, saye nie tak habis2 lagi kan dgn soulsearching?mase mule2 saye dodoikan baby untuk tidur, wani turun dari bilik and i ask her kalu2 die nak pegangn baby, die kate die xnak and terus blah pergi dapur.sedih jugak rase, but i couldn't blame her.mase volunteer nak keluar beli food pun, die yang keluar and we stayed with the baby.hmm..mase saye tulis blog nie, die dah tidur dalam bilik. dah 2x saye turun bawah to check on the baby while writing this blog even mak ade kat bawah.the second time i went, i saw wani kat baby tu. i was like, bile mase die turun x perasan pun.saye buat xtaw jelah and pergi duduk sebelah mak kejap.wani cakap,"mak, boleh x wani cium baby?bye2 Ari," die kiss kat due2 belah pipi baby tu. i was so touched, but dah penat la nak nanges kali ketige.=] and just like that, it doesn't matter to me anymore wht everyone was feeling, cuz i knew it.

Nur Ariessa, hye, selamat datang ke keluarga kami yang bahagia nie. along gembira Ari lahir and masuk jadi sebahagian dari keluarga nie.along harap, Ari jadi anak yang solehah dan berjaya satu hari nanti. Ari jangan risau, the 1st day Ari dah boleh cakap nanti, along akan ajar Ari bace and tulis.along nak ajar ari cakap bahasa Inggeris, along nak Ari pandai bace surat khabar bile umur Ari dah 4thn nanti macam budak yang pandai dulu tu.bile Ari dh bersedia and pham everything, along akan bg Ari bace post kat blog nie.but in the meantime,i want your future to be so bright that it blinds your eyes hehee=]buat mase nie, kitorang semua dalam proses belajar nak menerima dan memahami Ari.tp Ari jgn risau, along janji x lame, sebab sebenarnye deep down semua orang sayangkan Ari.bile orang tanye lagi, berape adik beradik along, along akan jawab sekarang, ade 4 orang semuanya, and semuanya perempuan.along bangga sangat. cepat membesar ye Ari..=)

p/s: pictures akan diupload nanti, bile saye dah jumpe mane cable saye, or bile wani dah bangun untuk pinjam kan cable dari die esok pagi. sorry guys!

opportunity

sometimes, you're too busy or preoccupied with yourselves that you missed out on opportunities to help others and getting blessed and whole.


sometimes, the opportunity to care and love for the world comes when you're leaving it, or when you know somebody who appreciated the planet has left, with a never-to-be-forgotten message.


sometimes, you haven't got a clue on what is in front of you or being brought to you, until it's being shoved down your nose. i'd say, God is giving us a second grace and we should make out the best we can through this opportunity.

If I Wrote A Note To GOD, Charice.




If I wrote a note to God
I would speak whats in my soul
I'd ask for all the hate to be swept away,
For love to overflow
If I wrote a note to God
I'd pour my heart out on each page
I'd ask for war to end
For peace to mend this world
I'd say, I'd say, I'd say

Give us the strength to make it through
Help us find love cause love is over due
And it looks like we haven't got a clue
Need some help from you
Grant us the faith to carry on
Give us hope when it seems all hope is gone
Cause it seems like so much is goin wrong
On this road we're on

If I wrote a note to God
I would say what on my mind
I'd ask for wisdom to let compassion rule this world
Until these times
If I wrote a note to God
I'd say please help us find our way
End all the bitterness, put some tenderness in our hearts
And I'd say, I'd say, I'd say

Give us the strength to make it through
Help us find love cause love is over due
And it looks like we haven't got a clue
Need some help from you
Grant us the faith to carry on
Give us hope when it seems all hope is gone
Cause it seems like so much is goin wrong
On this road we're on

No, no no no
We can't do this on our own
So

Give us the strength to make it through
Help us find love cause love is over due
And it looks like we haven't got a clue
Need some help from you
Grant us the faith to carry on
Give us hope when it seems all hope is gone
Cause it seems like so much is goin wrong
On this road we're on

If I wrote a note to God

shhhhhhhh~

ask me no questions, and i'll tell you no lies.

by Fred (or) George Weasley, Harry Potter and The Order Of The Phoenix

erk, sorry. nie Suri Cruise =)

syanaz & SPM

this pic was taken the first time we were about to send Syanaz off to MRSM Balik Pulau.

a note to my dear sister;

woot woot tomorrow is your big day kan? you'll be sitting for SPM, finally. lepas dua tahun, syanaz asyik2 call rumah and call mak (sampai mak kena call along sebab risau syanaz study teruk sangat), akhirnya sampai jugak masa yang ditunggu-tunggu nie waaah ayat syahdunye.kihkih..along tau, syanaz dah usaha untuk setiap subjek, and now all you have to do is tawakal.doa banyak-banyak pada Allah. along selalu doakan syanaz, macam mane syanaz selalu doakan along untuk setiap exam.syanaz jangan risau tau, you'll be just fine. along tau, syanaz nie budak pandai. mesti boleh skor hebat-hebat punye. syanaz pun anak, adik and along percaye, student yang baik, jadi Allah mesti tolong. syanaz ingat tak along bagitau dulu mase Syanaz form 4 and down sebab tak yakin pada diri sendiri? Along kate, "kalau kte nak Allah tolong kite, kite kena tolong Allah kan?," along harap syanaz tak lupe tu, x lupe untuk solat and mengaji Al-Quran, sebab semua benda datang daripadaNYA.all you have to do is usaha (which you have done), and let the rest be in God's Hand.semoga Dia berikan syanaz straight A dalam SPM nie.kitorang semua akan doakan syanaz macam tu. aminn..

i love you, eventhough you can hardly see the love through the many times i bully you around =) you're my BIG SISTER okay? you make us all proud taw.

p/s: err..please jangan cakap yang syanaz nak buat law, susah taw!ehe.wat medic erk?

what i'm up to so far

okay, as in till today, my holidays are somewhere between uneventful and simply exhilirating. for one, i have the TV, the internet lines, the storybooks and the wacky sister to entertain and play with. oh and not to mention, the until-nauseting delicious foods. best sangat. on the other hand, i've not been able to go anywhere yet. and we can't drop by to see Syanaz due to her SPM.and my beloved cousins are not back from their uni yet. so, as far as going-out concerns, it only extend to the front of my gate where i pick up the daily New Straits Time.

i like to watch TV, it's just that i'm waaaay too picky when it comes to the shows. i'm not like my other friends ( and they thought this is weird), because i have completely no interest in series like One Tree Hill, or Gossip Girls even. ayie and deline are my living proofs. i don't know why i don't like them. if ever i watch the series, it'll be only of accident or because there's a fashion in there that caught my attention. but lately, and due to lack of not knowing to do what else, i've decided to give them a try. manelah tau kaaan.

oh yeah, and Abah asked me just now if i could possibly help him to write an essay about a storybook that i've read, and how it affected life, from his point of view. that was when i've been reading Say You're One Of Them and he noticed that it was about struggles in Africa. he knows i don't read romance novels, and that's why he needs me to help with the writings. so i'm doing that for him, in exchange for 5 more storybooks (one of them is about Hitler!) from him. he promised me to get some of those old chinese-written novels that have been translated to English. so i'm all of a flutter now.that's one more thing i have to get down with for this holiday, so i think i'm pretty booked.

just now, Mak said she needed to go to the tailor to get her baju kurung done. i asked whether i can get my baju kurung done too. then i went on and on and on elaborating on how i wanted it to have sequins, and a little flare on the wrists and stuffs, and she went, "okay, shira ikutlah mak pergi tailor ye," theehee~it's for my law nite attire actually (no, not for raya haji), and since i don't want to blow a lot for the nite, i've decided to use my supposed-to-be cloth for raye aidilfitri and make it into what would look cute on me at lawnite (cute kah persoalannya di sini). it's just a small tailor shop btw. i'm not saying i'm saving that much money just to get the thing done by Rizalman okay?=]

it's still a simple, tailor-made bajukurung.

that's it for now i think, i'll give snippets once in a while when things get warmer around here. till then, toodles~

suppertime

dah kalau kerjanya pukul 2 pagi pun geledah peti sejuk and bawah tudung saji tu, ape citer? oh well, sekarang kan holiday. boleh menganbing mmmbbbbbkkk mmmmbbbbbkkkk!

nasib baik ade cake chocolate leftovers. weee sedap~

xpe, saye bukan dalam mission untuk diet or ape2 pun. if saye diet, mesti kena maki dgn kawan2 balik nanti ahh. and lagi satu, saye care ye pada kanak2 di Afrika yang kekurangan makanan tu, jadi saye takkan membazir lagi. oh gosh, why do you think i read Uwem Apkan?

baik-baik sayang

nie antara gmbr yang gua lukis mase tengah angau-angau rindu-rindu-rindu cintan-cintan sama itu hadzwan.

Perkenalkan, Wali - Baik-baik Sayang

Aku tak ingin kau menangis bersedih
Sudahi air mata darimu
Yang aku ingin arti hadir diriku
Kan menghapus dukamu sayang

Karna bagiku kau kehormatanku
Dengarkan dengakan aku


Hanya satu pintaku untukmu dan hidupku
Baik baik sayang ada aku untukmu
Hanya satu pintaku disiang dan malammu
Baik baik sayang karna aku untukmu

Semua keinginan akan aku lakukan
Sekuat semampuku sayang
Karna bagiku kau kehormatanku
Dengarkan dengarkan aku



lagu nie hadzwan yang dedicate, baru kejap tadi, gune gmail. bley tahan jugak lagu nie. tapi lagi boleh tahan if awak yang nyanyi kan kot? =]


eheheee..boyfren saye nie x romantik, honestly. tp he tries to be one. you know how people usually react when they don't know how to do certain things? like it's the first time some guy propose to a girl or the first time you say i love you? some guys ramble on every topic in the world but the main point, some talks way to fast to propose. some bite their nails, ruffle their hair, looking nervously around. some girls think that kinda cute, kan? because it shows sincerity.
that's exactly how i feel when hadzwan tries to be romantic. =) this is just one of the many few times..


i know i'm choosy, and picky, and oh-so hard to pleased. thank you for making the effort and thank you for the love, care and dedication that you have shown me throughout our time together.

1 YEAR AND THREE MONTHS DOWN THE ROAD, ALREADY.

d'penang

taylor momsen ni xde kena mengena ye, sekadar perhiasan =]

wuuhuu. saye sudah di rumah ye tuan-tuan dan puan-puan. rase sangat BEST!


well, buat mase nie, masih tak buat ape-ape lagi.bangun pun dah err..x perlu lah saye mention di sini. lunch tadi makan nasi and daging kicap yang sodap berserta chocolate cake. tujuan diberitahu: sebab i'm in heaven. okay, maybe malam nie saye sempat tengok Oprah (if abah tak tengok bola lagi), tapi xpe, if x tengok pun, esok ade rewind lagi rancangan tu. and the best ever is, abah dah trust saye untuk drive sampai ke Penang weeeeeeeeeeee~ jadi, saye dan wani mungkin akan berfoya-foya macam orang gile ahahaaa.ade banyaaaaaaaaaaaaak wayang yang saye nak tengok tau. Avatar is on top of the list.=]

kami takkan ke mane-mane cuti sekolah nie, except mak and abah yang akan ke Manila. don't ask me why we're not going too. it's suppose to be a business+romantic trip for them.hehee i'm not complaining, i'll get the house and the cars for myself yooo~lagipun, syanaz ade SPM, so takkan la kami boleh berjalan-jalan tanpa die wah kejam la kan?

holiday ni jugak, boleh dikatekan saye preoccupied sikit. ade assignment and mock script untuk siapkan.and since 1sy sem dah over and family dah habis, saye boleh la focus to subjects law yang lain.bak kate wyna, "1st sem jumpe family, 2nd sem jumpe consti, buruk betul la result,"
so, adakah anda mahu result anda menjadi buruk? marilah kite studi dengan lebih tekun ye!
mock script tu pun, roughly i know what to do. and 2, 3 characters dah form inside my head (x bleh blah..bajet cam scriptwriter betul ahahahaaa). the hard part is to do the funny scenes, but i'm thinking of making a big general one first untuk ditunjukkan pade miss director VOGUE hehee yes Ad, i bagi u merase director Vogue la.

wah, dah lapar balik..mana bisa? duduk rumah je sentiasa lapar kan? and i can smell something really nice coming from the kitchen. daaaaaaa for now peeps!

the Bi-atch note

sorry for not being patient,
sorry for being troublesome,
sorry for being mad,
sorry for being frustrated,
sorry for not smiling,
sorry for faking a laugh,
sorry for rolling my eyes,
sorry for the stiff words,
sorry for the strong gesture,
sorry for the anger,
sorry for not being able to stop my tears,
sorry for being such a baby,
sorry for being so dependent,
sorry for being nosy,
sorry for being irritable,
sorry for not being able to understand,
sorry for being so strong,
sorry for being hateful,
sorry for being spiteful,
sorry for being sinical,
sorry for being sarcastic,
sorry for not being an angel,
sorry for paying back,
sorry for not consoling with soother words,
sorry for turning the other cheek,
sorry for turning you off,
sorry for giving the wrong signals,
sorry for giving the false hopes,
sorry for the too-short messages,
sorry for the engaged calls,
sorry for cursing,
sorry for ignoring,
sorry for everything....
sorry for being able to live WITHOUT you.



death note,
laishira.

bluuuuueeeeeerrrggghhhhh~~~~~

just finished packing up to leave for home tomorrow. i'll be bringing a baggage, a bag and a tote that is filled with my clothes, my reading books and books which i'll need for my constitutional assignment later, one heels and wedges, my accessories, shawls ermm what else? banyak sangat tak ingat..


the rest i had to stuff it into my locker, i can barely close it now that it needed a kick. from this i can infer two hypothesis:


why oh why laa does my college have to be so ingenious as to take out an order on us to emptied our rooms. we had no choice but to make sure all our stuffs are gone. part of the reason was because of the Royal Debate thingy, but i still can complain rite? that reason couldn't match up with the fact that i have to heave and huff all the loads to KL SENTRAL alone tomorrow.
secondly, i get what my dad meant about me always have something to buy every single minute (read between the lines please!) my shoes took most of the compartments inside my locker! tomorrow i have to think of a way of how to put my pillows and teddies inside there too.


pffft.


still, can't wait for tomorrow. rise and shine early =]

say you're one of them

just got back from Borders, The Gardens.
and happily bought Say You're One Of Them, by Uwem Akpan.
it's off the shelves already on the Oprah Book's Club of course.
and i simply can't wait to indulge myself in the steamy novel, i've been craving and stopping myself to hit the bookstores before as i had to put priority on my schollbooks first.
i know this one could take me off my feet.

apart from that, there were sooooooo many books to choose from, if i didn't already set my mind on one book (and it came from Oprah, so it's a strong holdback), i would walk out of the store with bulging bags before i knew it. seriously, i just knew Cecilia Ahern wrote yet another book, The Book Of Tomorrow. hmm ciss la ctr The Gift pun saye x bace lagi =[ then, i saw Dead Souls by Nicolai Gogol. ohhh i love The Namesake and it was aired on tv too! and then, there was this two books whcih i have forgotten how badly i wanted them, they're called The God Of Small Things and Unaccoustomed Earth. i hope Abah can spare me some moolahs to splurge on them. and then, there's this one book called Freedom, it's real cool. it's a collection of stories from all over the world and it's about ordinary people trying to change the world into a better place kind-of-thing. just my type, oh and the best part is, all money from purchasing the book will go to the Amnesty International. bile saye kaye nanti, i'll buy the book kay?


i'm well comfortable and snuggled into Uwem Akpan.


can't wait to hop on the train back to Penang tomorrow =]

2012

best sangat2 due hari berjalan2 dengan cik ara. and housemates nye =]

pagi mule2 pergi sungai gabai (again) but this time dapat mandi sebab dah x demam lg dah. panjat tangga as usual boleh kalah tangga batu caves semputnye. brpe kali transit, sampai syu nak tangkap gmbr pun terketar-ketar penat. kali nie kena naik jauh lagi sebab port best ade this one group of boys ambik, tp okaylaa. the new port was best jugak, but i didn't dare stay in the water for a long time sebab trrrrrrrrsejjjjjjjjjjuuuuuuukkk.puas kena suruh dengan sara, syu, lia and ara pun xnak jugak. tp lame2 sebab dah bleh syak yang dorang akan tarik saye masuk jugak dlm air or akan percik2 air kat sane, saye pun berendam la lme sket.


pastu makan nasi goreng yang lia masak, pelahap sungguh. sumpah lapar + sejuk, if myra tengok saye makan mesti die bangga gile hahahaa.then kitorang naik lagi tinggi sebab nak cari ikan yang bleh urut2 kaki macam kat fish spa tu. naik ounye naik, tunggu punye tunggu, ikan x sampai2..nyanyi lagu ikan kaloi pun x menjadi kahkah. tp tempat yang jauh2 dlm gabai nie lagi best tau.sepi jee, sebab xde org yang nak sanggup naik sampai atas kan? pastu saye bagi la idea ambik batu sungai bleh wat skrub kat rumah. pastu si lia and sara bleh mintak izin dulu dengan nenek kebayan!! hahahaaaa gle horror.


balik2 rumah kat bangi, sola, tidur, bangun2 dah pukul 6 lebih. lapar and makan kat kedai mamak (yg x macam mamak pun, grand gle babs) kat depan rumah. best taw rumah dorang nie.lawa and dekat dengan guardian and 7E. okay la tu kan?


malam tu siap2 nak pergi tengok muvi 2012 kat alamanda. excited you, sebab x pernah mencemar duli kat situ. pastu plan utk karaoke lagi,*wink wink* my fave thing now.tapi pergi2 tickets sume dah sold out..cisss. tapi alamanda best. if shopping situ pun heaven, ke saye yang dah bosan dengan mid?heheee.

pastu we went tu IOI mall utk cr wayang tu, nasib baik laa ade. seat depan lagi, xkesah la janji dapat jugak tgk kan? sebelum masuk tu, bli macam2 dulu. bende2 wajib ade, pop corn, ice lemon tea, chipster and coke. seat depan pun not bad, sebab dapat seat tepi, so kepala x terconggok sangat.wayang kat IOI pun baru lagi, and mcm kat Gardens. seket2 eskalator, seket2 eskalator hahahahaa okay2 back to the movie.


certite tu mak aiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiihhhh seram sejuk dibuatnye. x habis mengucap. teruk gle disaster. rase cm kerusi yang diduduk pun bergegar2.keropok and popcorn pun x habis berusik sebab asyik sangat tengok movie tu. ade gak part2 sedey. part orang jahat tu cam x bleh blame sangat la.manusia ble dah desperate nak selamatkan diri,memang semua pun jadi pentingkan diri sendiri kan?yang xleh blah nye sebab takut sangat cik ara dah menjerit lame gle aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh and sorang2 plak tu.hehee selamatlah bunyi kat skrin tu lagi kuat hehehe =]


keluar2 je muke dah pucat, mule la pikir tobat.


nak pegi kat kete, tetibe teringat jacket tertinggal kat toilet wayang, race la pulak naik atas ala-ala selamatkan diri dr natural disaster muahahahahaaa x leh blah. nasib baik jumpe, agaknye org2 pun dah rami insaf lepas tgk ctr tu and taknak wat dajal kat org lain da kot.

then balik rumah, upload2 gmbr and tidur mase lepas subuh, bangun mase hadzwan dah balik sembahyang jumaat (ye, saye "perempuan melayu terakhir")hehee. now i'm in UM sweet UM.

masih x sabar nak bailk rumah!

a day ahead of nowhere

i'm on my way to err, i dunno where exactly yet. but it is to some place. i'm waiting for Ara to pick me up in UM. lucky i managed to get up early despite a tiring week of sleep deprive.


i was hoping to really utilise every second of my day today with her, as the last time we both see each other was at the beginning of the term (and now it's the end of it hahaa). so, x kisah lah if terbabas sampai melaka kan ara?


i can't wait to get hoooooooooooooooooome oh Goooooooooooooooooooooooooood oprah has started the new season and God knows what else i'm missing.last time, i left for UM half grudgingly when i got to know that oprah is doing a show bout remembering michael (hehee macam yang saye cakap kat abang kaunter tiket wayang semalam, "saye peminat tegar bang,")


now, i'm thinking whether perlu ke tak untuk bawak cd2 mj untuk didengari dalam kereta ara, and ara will probably go, "mungkin tak perlu di situ ye lai..aku pun ade!," muahahahaaaa owh owh gediknye.


lalaladilalalalalaalaidladilaidilaaa.


huhuu sebenarnye dah tataw nak tulis ape sebab nak kill time tunggu ara je nie datang. huahahaaa apsal la saye nie semangat sangat ye. eh, apsal kejap tulis english kejap tulis malay?oh, bukan selalu pun macam tu ke?? (heheheheheheheheee inside joke, sorry).


ape nak buat nie?


dengar lagu2 mj lagi lah!


bye peeps!

inilah dia!

what do ya know, two papers have since finished before my eyes. err. am reffering to my exam papers actually. family law and islamic criminal law. it was so-so. but i was quite relief, i dare not say the questions are not tough, but they live to my expectations though, so i can't complain. luckily for me, i think, that if all else fails, at least i did work my butt very hard for these papers. fails?? oh no.


tonite tonite tonite.
yes, what a magical night.
i sang, i hummed, i laughed,
inside i was crying so bad that i thought my heart would bleed.
it was nothing short of spectacular.
haha.
yep, am referring to THIS IS IT.

you probably would have guessed what the title suggest, but i want to write it down anyway.
MJ was beyond superb. he's perfect.
the would-be concert was sure gonna be the most amazing of its kind. i bet my fingers on it.
as usual, he brought in lots of props, which would turn into something larger than anyone of us could think of given that wasn't just a rehearsal.
gotta be starting something,jam,they don't care about us, thriller, beat it, earth song, i just can't stop loving you,the way you make me feel, human nature, billie jean, black or white, smooth criminal, i'll be there, the love you save, i want you back,man in the mirror.
there's not one i can favouritely pick over the other,every single thing was bestla!


i like the part where he goofs on the cherry picker, the part where he changed the way he wanted the keyboards to sound in the the way you make me feel, i love the new vid for earth song and smooth criminal and thriller, but i always would have a spot for the old ones instead. and i particularly like the guitarist girl, Orianti Pavaroli, which attire i strongly suspect were sponsored by Topshop.


i watched it with my friends at 9 pm.
what they didn't know is that i could not contain myself and got a ticket for 11.30pm too!
oh.yes.

heal the world, peeps, cuz THIS IS IT.